Welcome to the Upper East Side, Bitches.

So, I’m watching Gossip Girl last night, and  Serena van der Woodsen is right in the middle of telling Dan Humphrey that she does choose him after all… and I suddenly have this vague feeling of, “I’ve seen this before. Where have I seen this before? Where have I see a wealthy It Girl choosing the soulful but poor loner over her society beau?”

Oh, I know. I saw it on The OC.

I can’t possibly be the first person to  find similarities between the two shows, and I know there’s plenty of difference…. but the more I think about it, the more I’m thinking that Josh Schwartz wasn’t quite ready to be done with the tony world of Orange County and maybe he wanted to fix some of his past mistakes.

Observe.

We’ll start obvious.

Serena van der Woodsen: free spirited, high society, effortlessly beautiful debutante with history of partying a little too hard and member of highly dysfunctional family featuring gold digging mother

Marissa Cooper: free spirited, high society, effortlessly beautiful debutante with history of partying a little too hard and member of highly dysfunctional family featuring gold digging mother

And what does every winsome, ethereal blond need? Why a ball-busting, scheming, hilarious, slightly obsessive brunette best friend who is actually much more interesting and comes from a slightly less dysfunctional family but will find tragedy by falling for the exact wrong person that is actually SO RIGHT.

Summer Roberts, meet your ambutious Queen Bee doppleganger, Blair Waldorf.

Oh, I know, Sum. She is nothing but a cheap harlot knock-off. But, I don’t know… you should give her a shot. She’s sort of hilarious.

The boys, as they so often do, pose a problem. They don’t quite match up with one another, but there’s  enough there to make a case.

Take one lonely boy  watching the girl he can’t have since childhood….

and add a dash of  poor outsider with so much potential! entering new world…

and… voila!  Dan Humphrey!

Now let’s take a handsome, buff, rich athlete dating the perfect girl since kindergarten…

only he’s kind of a jerk since he’s cheating on her…

only then, in an unexpected twist, he finds out that his family is pretty much falling apart because his dad is embezzling money from his clients and he’s suddenly humanized and willing to date people who know that money is not everything!

Nate Archibald, turns out you get the distinction of being an amalgamation of the failed parts of once steaming hot couple.

And, I know what you’re thinking, Chuck Bass. You’re thinking you’re one of a kind.  Yeah, okay. You’re Chuck Bass.

But you shouldn’t wear that suit unless you are hawking fried chicken.

Now, how about those parental units?

Have you been missing the wise words of Sandy Cohen, a man nostalgic for his free younger days when he met the love his life who now dispenses  sage advice and provides witty banter to any teen that walks into his kicthen?

Look no further than Rufus Humphrey! Once famous band member who also met the love his life when he was young and carefree!

Only– poor Rufus, turns out his  bird-boned, blond haired, dainty and long suffering first love can’t marry him because  she has to double up and play both super mom Kirsten Cohen and Julie “I swear I’m not marrying him for money” Cooper.

But no worries. Lily, like her comrad in arms Julie, will find her love in the father of the kid from the wrong side of the tracks.  You know, when she’s done learning money won’t buy her happiness.

Oh? And Caleb Nichol?

I’d love for you to meet Bart Bass…

…only you have both died tragically after marrying a much younger woman.  But you would have had so much to talk about, since you’re both such real estate moguls with kids you love but find to be disappointing, and they ARE kind of slutty.

But the similarities don’t end there.

Need a token ethnic girl that will come along and wreck other romances and be kind of annoying?  Done!

How about the required gay teen that won’t have much of a story line other than coming out of the closet? Check!

And what teen soap would be complete without a latecomer floppy haired kid who cozies up to the leggy, good-hearted, goldielocks who already has a deep and soulful boyfriend but needs some tension to really remind her of how much better he is?

OMG, I cannot even tell Aaron Rose from Johnny. Who even cares??

And Little J?

I can think of another horribly annoying character who might be kind of a mistake…..

Why, hello there Oliver!   Ruined anyone’s season lately?  You and Jenny have so much to discuss. Also, now that I think about it, you and Chuck Bass have a similar sartorial style.

I could really go on and on and on.  But I’ll stop here and let you have some fun as well.   But before I go, I just want to point out that I just don’t think that most exclusive prep schools have dress codes that are so flexible and it’s just too coincidental to find two such schools.

Also, if you really miss Seth Cohen, you should just head over to watch Chuck because that’s where he seems to be hanging out these days, Jewfro and all.

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Posted on January 11, 2009, in TV shows and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Genius.

    I’ve been having urges to start re-watching the entire OC lately… The day Netflix finally loads The OC into ‘Watch Instantly’ is the day I don’t move from this chair for the next 50+ hours.

  2. You know you can catch the re-runs on soap net? And I can get a few at a time on On Demand. They have it listed under The WB for some reason.

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